Wilting Daffodils in natural light.

These images are the last ones captured with my trusty 1970s-era Minolta SR-T 202 film camera, which I inherited from my father. By this time, the camera was becoming mechanically unsound, sticking and scratching the film. However, it still produced these uniquely scratched multiple exposure photographs.

In the evolution of my visual ideas, I have for as long as I can remember been fascinated by the nature of decay and have attempted to capture, in photography/video/painting the ephemeral qualities of decaying objects and life.

I have long been interested in exploring the qualities of sex, love, and other complex aspects of life through the lens of nature, particularly flowers. Many artists, writers, and musicians have tackled similar themes before me, and their work has served as a starting point for my own creative process in this area.

Whether it’s Imogen Cunningham’s soft-focused images of plant life, Ansel Adams’ early modernist aesthetics, Mapplethorpe’s flower studies, Karl Blossfeldt’s photogravures of flora, Hiroshige’s hibiscus flowers, the intense longing in O’Keeffe’s desert flowers, or Hokusai’s dynamic prints, these artists have captivated my attention and drawn me to the subject matter.

I have always been more focused on the subtle subtext present in this material, using these inspirations in my practice by seeking opportunities in mistakes, happenstance, and what may seem like “random” chaos. For as long as I have held a brush, I believed that the conscious creator often diverts their true self from the turmoil of “unconscious” or “semiconscious” creation. The intentional artist uses craft and technique as a shield, concealing the depths of their desires, pain, joy, anxieties, and frustrations from both the audience and themselves.

I want to clarify that I’m not discussing intentionality here, as I am fully aware of my choices and decisions while I work. Instead, I aim to embrace and accept mistakes, chaos, and shortcomings both in the processes I use and in my performance of these methods. This mindset helps me avoid what I refer to as the “right brain” trap, which insists that images must be in focus, symmetrical, or neatly arranged in a grid, as well as clear, legible, and broadly accessible.